God-dreaming
Still here in Kuwait, Camp Buerhing to be exact. Me and thousands of other Soldiers waiting to "head north" and get started on our rotations. The extra bodies makes it harder to find a computer to use. Used to be able to walk into the computer lab and get right on. Now there's a 10-15 minute wait each time.
Today's Sunday and it's a day of rest. It's not a day off; I still have some work to do and some training to attend, but it's a day of rest. Tonight at 1900 I'll head to a worship service. Worship styles in the military aren't as prolific as they are back home. There's no Lutheran worship to go to, so I have to settle for "traditional Protestant," which is some non-denominational guy trying to be liturgical. (Note: if you don't understand some of these terms it's because you probably don't live church polity every day. However, I need to use the jargon because I don't have time to explain it. 'nuff said.) The bottom line is this: if I were going for the people, I wouldn't go at all. But I go for the Word of God.
You see, I God-dream during most sermons and I have to. As my first year Homiletics professor at Seminary predicted, it's almost impossible for me to enjoy a sermon anymore. Probably the same way it's impossible for an NFL head coach to watch a high school football game. Once you've removed the curtain and seen how it's supposed to be done or how well it can be done, you become hypercritical.
So, I God-dream now. It's like day-dreaming except I don't see myself as a fighter pilot or a heavyweight boxer like the little guy from the Looney Toons cartoons. Instead, I usually wander off somewhere in the Word and see where God leads me. I listen for the Holy Spirit to prompt me to places that I need to go, places that need God's forgiveness, reconciliation, strength, or power. Even though I'm in a room with dozens of other people and a pastor is preaching about something, most times I'm off on my own.
My guess is that many of you do the same thing when you go to church, but you feel guilty about it. You think, "why can't I focus on what this pastor is saying?" The reason is that he may not be saying what you need to hear. The Holy Spirit, which lives inside of us through Baptism, may be leading us somewhere else. The key thing is to make the time to listen.
So, tonight, I'll make the time to listen to God. It will be in the context of worship, but I'll probably be off somewhere else, listening to what God wants me to hear.
Today's Sunday and it's a day of rest. It's not a day off; I still have some work to do and some training to attend, but it's a day of rest. Tonight at 1900 I'll head to a worship service. Worship styles in the military aren't as prolific as they are back home. There's no Lutheran worship to go to, so I have to settle for "traditional Protestant," which is some non-denominational guy trying to be liturgical. (Note: if you don't understand some of these terms it's because you probably don't live church polity every day. However, I need to use the jargon because I don't have time to explain it. 'nuff said.) The bottom line is this: if I were going for the people, I wouldn't go at all. But I go for the Word of God.
You see, I God-dream during most sermons and I have to. As my first year Homiletics professor at Seminary predicted, it's almost impossible for me to enjoy a sermon anymore. Probably the same way it's impossible for an NFL head coach to watch a high school football game. Once you've removed the curtain and seen how it's supposed to be done or how well it can be done, you become hypercritical.
So, I God-dream now. It's like day-dreaming except I don't see myself as a fighter pilot or a heavyweight boxer like the little guy from the Looney Toons cartoons. Instead, I usually wander off somewhere in the Word and see where God leads me. I listen for the Holy Spirit to prompt me to places that I need to go, places that need God's forgiveness, reconciliation, strength, or power. Even though I'm in a room with dozens of other people and a pastor is preaching about something, most times I'm off on my own.
My guess is that many of you do the same thing when you go to church, but you feel guilty about it. You think, "why can't I focus on what this pastor is saying?" The reason is that he may not be saying what you need to hear. The Holy Spirit, which lives inside of us through Baptism, may be leading us somewhere else. The key thing is to make the time to listen.
So, tonight, I'll make the time to listen to God. It will be in the context of worship, but I'll probably be off somewhere else, listening to what God wants me to hear.
1 Comments:
Tom, I was moved to a great sadness by something in this post. How sad that it seems a single professor's comments have been allowed to rob you of the joy of God working and speaking through other people. I confess feeling a similar way when I was teaching full-time - convinced that no one else could present or teach as well as I could. And it wasn't until God ripped me from my classroom and set me up as substitute that I was finally able to learn - and enjoy learning - from others. I came to appreciate other styles of presentation & people's personalities b/c at the heart of it, these teachers care just as much as I do about children. I pray you find a similar thread to hang onto while away from your home church.
Nyiaak
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