Another Glimpse of Anaconda
So here it is...the first photo from Ananconda. This is me and MAJ Moore in our best "killer" pose. Although, I do have to say that his weapon is a little more formiddable than mine. Yes, that is a Nerf Dart Gun that I am holding. No, that's not a Nerf Dart Gun that MAJ Moore is holding. (Mr. Suckow will be happy to know that my Dart Gun has a "laser sight." Now, if I just had a stack of beer cans.) The other thing that you will notice is that I am sporting a new 'do or rather a lack of a 'do. Shaving my head is all about time management. It's easier to take 10 minutes every other day than find the time to go a barber once a week. Don't worry, I'm not folicly-challenged like some; mine will grow back.
Had a rough couple of days this week. One of my duties is to perform a Ramp Ceremony for Fallen Heroes that come through our Mortuary Affairs Collection Point (MACP). Anaconda's got one of the busiest MACP's in theater. This week I had one ceremony where we loaded six flag-draped transfer cases onto a C-17. We did it in the early evening, one of the hottest times of the day. It's my job to lead each transfer case onto the aircraft with appropriate military honors. However, there were also 20+ Servicemembers there to honor the fallen as well. Then we also had one tonight, just days later. I have been averaging one every three-four days. None of them are people from my battalion; all of them are "strangers." Yet, all of them represent a fallen brother in arms and so they are family.
I work very hard to let it get to me. That's right let it get to me. I don't ever want that just to be a job, a duty, something perfuntory that has to be performed. I want it to be meaningful, thoughtful, and honorable. The downside to this is finding a way to let the emotions go.
As I see it, there are two extremes that I can fall into. I can become a cold-hearted military autonomaton that just shows up, does his job, places the transfer case on the aircraft, and walks away. The other extreme is to get so wrapped up in all the effects that this flagged-draped case represents, that I can't control my emotions and I'm a blubbering mess. There has to be some middle ground. I'm not going to claim to have found it yet, but I'm comfortable with where I am at now. I can still get better at it and that's what I'm striving to do.
But isn't that what we're all striving to do? Are we all striving to get better at the hard things that our daily lives bring to us? Keep striving, friends.
5 Comments:
Thanks for your good work with those who have made the ultimate sacrifice.
As someone who has watched a family meet their loved one's remains at a small airstrip in Iowa, I am 99.9 percent positive that every single one of those families of lost soldiers appreciate that you are maintaining that oh-so-challenging middle ground. One of your most significant challenges as a chaplain, I believe, is going to be maintaining your own mental health. Nearly two months in, you appear to be holding your ground.
I think the desire to 'keep it real' will always conflict with 'doing my job'. How many times in one weekend have you given the same sermon? How many times have I taught the To Kill A Mockingbird? How many times has Ann written of heartache? Your situation right now is more intense, I understand that; but this concept is not really a new one to you. Rely on prayer; rely on the prayers of others for you; rely on your experience; rely on your training.
(I'm actually not as much of a hardass as it seems when I post to your blog...)
Thank you for your "realness" in your blog, brother. You rock my world (by the grace of God)! Stand firm on the Rock!
Thanks for all you and all of the men and women over there are doing for those of us safe and sound back here in the states.
And there's nothing wrong with being folically challenged. As the saying goes, "God created a few perfect heads, the rest he covered with hair!"
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